nokids

After I had got over the next phase of drizzling misery, I decided it was time to be more proactive. I decided to seek medical help.

I already knew that I was over the age to get free treatment on the NHS for fertility problems, so I approached my local BUPA hospital. Another mistake! The consultant I saw was so smug and superior in her attitude towards me. Granted, she did give me a helpful mini-tutorial on how women’s fertility changes as they age (information which no one had clearly put to me before). However, she then changed tack and took up a moral stance. Not only were my chances of success low in any event, given my age, but she herself did not feel able to treat me, a single woman. The fact that I was a professional with a reasonable salary, my own home and a car, to say nothing of the thought I had given to this venture and my intrinsic maternal abilities, counted for nothing. This rather overweight and obviously fecund female doctor (pictures of her children were on her desk), after a mere 20 minutes or so, had judged me and found me wanting. She managed to imply that my very normal desire to have a child was somehow quite grubby. That interview deflated me for many months.